Getting older is definitely not for the faint of heart. Everyday, we have those times when we are alone with fear and yet we manage to push through.
Then, the unexpected happens. No, not to us, but rather to a loved one.
It’s then that we experience the pain that seeps deepest into our souls.
The begging on their behalf begins with a prayer. Time passes and desperation sets in and we find ourselves going through the full spectrum of emotions that would have us asking to trade places.
Nothing is under our control anymore.
This was the case for me. This is a deeply personal story whose details are not the point of this tale. My hope for you is to declare, here and now, that if this dark shadow passes your path, you will know, you are not alone.
Alone. Means, no one hears your cries. I hear you.
Cries need to happen or the weight of the pain will defeat you… trust me, you can carry on.
Controlling the enormity of all the “what if’s” requires faith. You will find that ability to believe in the best outcome.
It is never too late to trust in the powers greater than ourselves, again or even for the first time. ASK.
Regardless of what happens…just know the pain will dissolve and you’ll find peace. Maybe a new kind of steadiness within that has gotten you to this age. Maybe that will help you find your way forward again.
We are resilient, so much more than our aching bones or our broken hearts would allow us to embrace initially.
Never allow weakness to enter into the conversation. We’re allowed to get tired. Not, “I’m going to take a nap, tired.” Rather to allow for the kind of weariness that requires a bit of regrouping. Similar to an army in battle.
These battles that we have to face when someone we love is struggling requires a different kind of strength to help shore them up even if we have many notches on the tree branch indicating the years we’ve lived.
Living fully means experiencing all manner of joys alongside the pain that reminds us to find our gratitude every day. Tap into that joy, often, before the storms arrive.
My story, fortunately, had a happy ending this time. At least for now.
That’s being realistic, not fatalistic, by the way.
My cries did not go unheard. My pain was embraced because I knew I had to reach out to get some help to make it through.
Please do the same should you be faced with a pain so much greater than you can navigate on your own.
Pat Larsen, lives, works, plays and prays in Greene County, NY
Her syndicated columns enjoy a vast readership among several local counties. Her first book…Reflections…anything but an ordinary life is available on Amazon or request a signed copy at pelarsen5@sol.com
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